Friday, January 13, 2012

Interview with Maxi From The Shire for his birthday

Big Maxi McKernan or "Maxi from The Shire" as he is known in the blogosphere, celebrates his 31st birthday today.  Max is somewhat of a local legend around the Cronulla / Engadine area so I felt, as a tribute to the man, I would interview him for my blog so everyone can see just what it is that makes the great man tick.

For those of you who do not know him, Maxi is a man with many notches on his belt. Not all of those notches have been made with a steak knife for extra room either. He is an accomplished rugby league player, indeed one of the finest talents Super League unearthered. He would no doubt be a household name if not for politics involved in the super league war. He is a life member of the Cronulla Sharks and the Engadine Dragons No.1 supporter, establishing their fan army "The Hill". He is a preferred consultant to Lightman Industries, has been headhunted by several international companies and is in current talks with the next season of dancing with the stars (he is just waiting to see if there will be any scheduling or contractual conflicts with his contract as he has signed on with Shine TV as the Australian "the Situation" on the shire's answer to Jersey Shore)..

Me: First of all let me say a big happy birthday to you Maxi. How are you celebrating this event?

Maxi: Thanks Bails. I am planning on an early morning breakfast down at Cronulla so I can have a perve on all the mothers pushing their strollers. There is just something about a mother that really does it for me. I would really like to be a mother myself one day.

Me: Now Maxi, you are very well known throughout the Sutherland Shire and possess a vast array of talents. How would you describe yourself to our readers?

Maxi: Your right Bails, the Big Max is a layered character. I am one part rockstar, one part pornstar and all man. I am extremely competitive and hate losing, as you can see from my waistline. I don't think I can sum myself up in only a few words as for every layer that is peeled an even more inspiring one flows forth.

Me: We first met on the football field as youngsters when you were playing for Engadine and me for De La. I recall after one encounter your dad approached me asking me to go easy on you. I had apparently tackled you and sent you off crying. Talk me through this traumatic experience.

Maxi: I'd rather not talk about that thanks John. My ribs are still rather sore and the mental anguish has not faded.

Me: Understandable. You did recover from this to go on and become the great man that you are today though the super league war wasn't very kind to you. You have been quoted as describing it as being torn between two parents, with both the ARL and Super League vying heavily for your services. Your eventual decision to run with Super League ultimately sounded the death knell for your football career. Do you have any regrets?

Maxi: No real regrets Bails. I flew high and touched the moon. I achieved things the majority of people only dream about. I guess my biggest regret in my footballing career was never being able to really get the best of De La. They just always had our measure.

Me: Maxi, before we go on, one of your fans has emailed through a fan question. Mitch from Engadine has said "Hi Maxi, Mr Mitch here with a quick question on your footy career. How did you manage to keep your feet planted on the ground during your magnificent career and do you now sometimes sit back and watch your career highlights and reflect on a great period in your life?"

Maxi: I'll be honest with you Mitchell, it wasn't easy. I was the king of Carmens with girls throwing themselves at me all over the place. I would have 2, sometimes 3 girls approach me all within the the space of a year and let me tell you they weren't after directions to the nearest service station. Ok, maybe 2 of them were but they were still heady days. It was lucky I had an good strong head on my shoulders that kept me above all that sort of garbage. In respect to my highlights, yes I will quite often sit back and reflect on my days at the top of the rugby league pecking order bulldozing all those in my path with a quiet ale in my hands. I was a God amongst men. 

Me: Well Maxi, we are just about out of time. I really appreciate you talking with me today. Is there anything you would like to say to your sea of fans before departing?

Maxi: Thanks Bails, I really admire you and having the chance to get on this blog has been the best birthday present I could ask for. To my fans, I'd just like to leave you with my standard motto - live life to the Max!

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